My Story

While in college, I was the guy voted to get married first. I looked forward to marriage and planned to have children early in life but it didn’t work out that way. As the years turned to decades, the hope and dream of being married to a wonderful woman and having children began to fade.

 

In my 40’s, especially my late 40’s, I was about to give up hope on kids since I didn’t know anyone who had children that late in life. Searching the web, I found a few movie stars and other rich and famous, but even those were few and far between.

 

Eventually I did marry at the age of 50 and had my first child at 51. We were blessed with our second son two years later.

So be encouraged, you too can have happy, healthy children after 50!

As my sons passed through the toddler years it began to be clear to me that having children late in life has its unique challenges which led me to start FathersAfter50.

Best to you all, Greg

 

 

The picture to the right,  I think I’m about 30.  I need to find one from my 20’s!

How FathersAfter50 came to life

The idea first came to me over 10 years ago. When I was in my late 30’s & 40’s I wasn’t married & was getting a bit depressed about it. I’d been in several long term relationships that didn’t work out. In my late 40’s I was trying to find anyone, anywhere who had a child after 50, just to have hope. Back then the internet wasn’t what it is today so it was a real challenge to find men who became fathers after the age of 50. Every now and then a newspaper or magazine might mention someone famous who had a child after 50 …. which gave me hope.

 

Much to everyone’s surprise, I did get married. At the age of 50. Then was blessed with my first son at 51 & my 2nd at 53. The idea of FathersAfter50 was still on my mind to encourage others who want children later in life but as time passed and life circumstances changed I realized having children after 50 is much different than having children in your 20’s, 30’s or even 40’s. That realization is what led me to start FathersAfter50.

FathersAfter50

The unique aspect of Fathers After 50 are stories about men (and women) who had children after the age of 50. But it is much more than that.

 

The goal is to inspire everyone to become all they can be, especially those of us who are over 50 who might have given up on our dream, perhaps our health isn’t as good as we’d like, or we’re having trouble with finances or relationships. If we can be inspired to take action on our goals and dreams, often everything else falls into place.

 

So my guests tend to be those who are either experts in their field (of any age), but the majority are about people who have started a business, dramatically improved their health, or have achieved something remarkable after the age of 50.

 

I hope you are helped and inspired by listening to the many great guests on Fathers After 50!

 

All the best, Greg

Me and my boys a couple of years ago

My 1st century (100 mile) bike ride

June 15th, 2019.   The thought of riding 100 miles came to me about 6 months ago when a 50 yr old woman was telling me how she’s run 3 different 100 mile marathons in the past 5 years.  I was impressed with the fact that she had to run all day and into the night to finish some of the races since one was in the Rocky Mountains which meant “running” includes walking part of the way.  For many, it is not possible to finish it during daylight hours!

 

Her story reminded me of my first major failure I faced in my early 20’s.  For whatever reason, I thought I’d run across the United States to beat the all time record of 48 days (today the record is 42 days).  Over several months I pictured the fame, fortune, and glory that would all be mine as I crossed that finish line in San Francisco.  Then finally, I decided it was time to do something about it, I needed to see how far I could run!  So one hot muggy July day in Georgia, I began my training.  I can still remember that day clearly in my mind.  I ran for maybe an hour before giving in to the heat, humidity, my aching legs and dashed dreams.  I had a lot of time to think as I walked home downhearted and glum, my dream of glory gone as I  finally reached home, collapsed into bed and fell fast asleep for hours from physical and mental exhaustion. I never tried running long distance again.

 

Over the years I failed at other endeavors.  In my late 20’s me and a friend wrote software to keep track of the hours aviators flew (called a flight logbook).  We were convinced we’d make a lot of money.  Over the next few months we spent hundreds of hours coding and testing.  Finally the software was finished.  We didn’t even sell one copy of our software!  Pilots preferred to just write it down in their leather-bound logbooks.  Go figure. Maybe we should have done a little market testing. As years became decades,  I joined a few companies that went eventually went under, totally bankrupt.  One was a billion dollar company when I joined!  Two of those companies I held a good bit of stock options, thinking I’d cash in for millions!  Every stock option I was ever granted became worthless.  I was also part of many layoffs which takes its toll on the spirit and soul.  In my 40’s I changed professions, thinking sales was a better match for my personality than sitting in a cubicle coding software or managing people who sat in cubicles all day long.  Over the next 2 years in sales, I was fired from 4 companies.  The 5th company was a large software firm and I was told my 3rd month that if I didn’t meet quota I’d be fired in 30 days.  I don’t know what happened within me but something changed.  I told myself I was tired of being part of layoffs.  Tired of being fired. Tired of losing.  Tired of failure.  I made quota at the end of the month.  Barely.  But over the next several months I became the 2nd best sales rep on our team of 15.  And for the following 9 years I was always in the top 5% of the all company sales reps (100+).  Since then I’ve learned a lot about setting goals.  I’m still learning. In the past couple of years I’ve learned how important it is to follow through on all goals so our subconscious doesn’t tell us that we are failures or quitters.  Instead, we want to know that we positively, absolutely will do what we tell ourselves we will do.  That we can always trust ourselves!

 

Now about my 100 mile ride:   I began training about 6 months before I rode the century.  At first it was 15 minutes a couple of times a week.  Then I bumped it up to 30 minutes. It was during one of those 30 minute rides that I was thinking, why am I doing this?  What is the point?   I’m tired. This is stupid to be doing at my age (60). Why did I make this a goal in the first place? Why don’t I quit?  It was then that I realized I have to keep training and MUST finish my goal of riding 100 miles.  Or at least attempt to finish …. but quitting before ever starting?  Nope, not gonna let my mind think I’m a failure.  So over the next couple of months I’d ride at least an hour, sometimes two, once a week.  And believe me, the idea to quit popped into my mind a few more times but by then I’d firmly made up my mind I would at least keep training, then try to finish.  I was suppose to work up to riding 6 hours before attempting the 100 miles but had too many other things on my plate to ever ride more than a couple hours each week.

 

Finally, the day arrived.  June 15th, 2019.  It was a near perfect weather day to ride. High 60’s in the morning and low 80’s when I finished around 4 pm. I left the house around 6:15 in the morning and arrived at the start a few minutes before 7 am. I was surprised the parking lot of the Silver Comet Trail was almost full. I took a couple of pictures at the “0.0” starting line and began my ride. The first 10 miles went by easily. I drank one coconut water before I left. I held a water and an orange when I started out and ate the orange and drank water while riding (it makes the time go by faster). The 20 mile marker was my first milestone and I took a quick break to walk around. I was riding at a good pace but not pushing myself.  Sometime after the 20 mile mark my left knee started bothering me and after the 30+ miles my right knee felt the same stresses. The 34th mile marker I was telling myself I’m 33% done but I wondered if I would make it. I got off my bike the 2nd time a bit after the 50 mile marker.  Somewhere around the 60 mile mark I started feeling like 100 miles is way too long to ride. The tendons around both knees were still feeling stressed as well as muscles in various parts of my body.

 

During miles 30-50 I noticed groups of cyclists passing me, each group wearing identical jerseys.  Obviously various riding teams.  At least that is what I told myself as they blew past me.  I noticed the lone rider with an orange Terradata jersey around mile marker 30.  A few hours later, around mile marker 80, Terradata gave me a thumbs up as he passed me by (again) on the way back. I have no idea how far he rode but apparently he realized I’d ridden at least 60-80 miles at that point in time.  Apparently I did not dress or look like I was suppose to be riding 100 miles!

 

I Stopped at least 4 times on the way back, each time to stretch a bit.  By now, my knees, calves, achilles tendons, and surprisingly, my biceps were all complaining at different levels.  More than once during the last 20 miles I thought I must have a flat tire. I was in 5th gear and going slow (the 1st 50 miles I rode entirely in 10th gear).  It wasn’t a flat tire.  It was me.  Both times I thought I had a flat tire, I ate something (nuts, energy bar) and drank coconut water which miraculously made my bike work better.

 

During my last two stops I didn’t even try to sit on my heals to stretch out my calves and thighs. It felt too painful to my muscles and especially me knees to stand back up.  Finally, 9 hours and 11 minutes later, I made it!  100+ miles in a day.  I’d programmed another “win” into my brain!

 

A couple days later I could walk down the stairs without my legs or knees complaining.  3-4 days later my body was back to normal (no aches or pains).  But my mind, my belief that I will do what I tell myself I will do …. is feeling better every day!

 

May we all set a goal, create a process and plan to complete the goal, then follow our plan to completion!  We need to believe in ourselves and have proof that we will always follow through!

 

 

All the best,  Greg

 

 

9 hours, 11 minutes later I’m at the finish line!  Yes, this is the same spot where I started.  Initially I planned to ride 100 miles straight, then realized it is much easier to ride 50, then turn around.  No need to shuffle cars!

You might wonder why I’m wearing a balaclava mask, long sleeves and gloves on a hot day in June?  Well, during my training I learned a few things.   I don’t recall the order I learned these but a bug in your eye wearing contacts can just about run you off the narrow path into a tree!  Idea:  don’t wear contacts, wear those glasses you don’t want anybody to see.  A few rides later my helmet got hot and my head itched.  When you can’t scratch an itch on an hour long ride, that itch is all you’re gonna think about!  The balaclava stopped the itch, kept the sun off my neck, and kept my glasses in place!  Long sleeves?  I don’t wear sunscreen (another story) and I didn’t want to get burned since a long stretch of the 100 mile ride is in the sun.  And finally the gloves.  Before I bought gloves, there were times when the palms of my hands felt like they’d taken a beating after an hour or two ride.  It is amazing how a little bit of padding in the gloves make such a huge difference.  Problem solved!  Like many other areas in life, after we do something for awhile and think of solutions, it is much easier and more enjoyable!